Saturday, October 30, 2010


ahh..! today is saturday lorr..! weekend day right? but then i hv to attend class today..kelas ganti untuk cuti deepavali..waaaa! sux..! hahaha..
dh laaa proposal pon lom siap ag..kecian nye ak..! 8hb niey exam pulak exm beb! study pon not yet! goin preparation nothing itu semua cabran sbg seorang studnt right..? thiz sem i target pointer 3 and above..uhh! pharmacy is a critical course..! so i hv to struggle wat ever my condition is! i need ur support..ur prays..ur back up and ur advise..everytin from yours..!
keyh la i got to go now..goin class as early as care those who are in final exam's mood..guck luck babe..!! do ur best..chaiyookk..!

p/s: menghadap lappy je kebelakangan niey..buku bila pulak hadap??

Saturday, October 23, 2010

sHoPPinG at ThE stOre..!

wah..including today at two times in a row I was shopping at The Store Sg Buloh..I'm not even sure what the so fun when shopping at The Store, but that fact that you all should know is this..! yesterday i went to there by motor wif daus n mail..nad today by taxi wif radzuan..huurr! today bought some cakes..pecan butterscotch mengenyangkan..! yg paling most interesting part adalah kte org nyaris maut td..alhmdulilah idop lagi ak smpai malam ini..hihi..sbb td kte org wan corss da road..then byk glerr kete..siot je ase td..tobat x nk g lagi..rela mam kek secret recipe kt mid valley laa..ahhaha..lau x mati katak laa ak..!

p/s: skng tgh struggle buat proposal..wish me luck ya! =)

Monday, October 18, 2010

"siLLy" JouRneY..!! vs "haPPeNinG" jOurNey..!!

huhu..! so tired damn tired..! fuckin tired..! hahahah..
sorry guys..i just came back from KL Sentral actually..the story is started at hospital sg buloh..after class sharp 5pm shima, ateh and i got da taxi went to KTM station at sg buloh.then ask the counter bout da ticket..the purpose is juz wan to get da train's ticket goin back to Kelantan for Hari Raya Aidiladha..but then the system is down! so unfortunately we all must get another nearest station to get da ticket while others maybe the system is in good condition..! then we all bought da ticket went to Kepong Sentral..about 5mins from Sg Buloh.. once again unfortunately ateh n syima still in da train then i oredi drop there..but then i oredi told them to drop at Kepong Sentral..hurrr..! after that i have to wait them for next train from Kepong about 20mins..hurr..! waste the time..! after they'll arrived..we all ask the counter.."puan, train to timur at wakaf bharu ada lagi x?" the counter said " still close sir.." then of dispute in at the counter.. " why i went sg buloh said oredi opened..hurmm!" ..i being warmed after that..!! we still not satisfied with that answer then we bought ticket went to KL Sentral..coz KL Sentral is da HQ of KTM..then the aswer we got is already out..! hirr..sold out..! really warmed and burned!! then after we had a dinner there..we quickly bought the ticket went to buy ticket bus goin to Kelantan.,.finally i got the ticket on 16th..huhu..after that we were rushed to get the train and bouught ticket to Sg buloh..then train delayed about an hour..!! hurrr..but then when time of train delayed we were have a lots of story to share between us..i luv u girls..ateh n shima..gonna mish u after diz..about a year we werent see, outing, eating together..!! huhu..sob3..
then i hope u all when buy da ticket plzzz take care urself..coz sorry i really cant accompony u all anymore..!! hope we meet again semester 6...!!

p/s : terjumpa lelaki misteri dlm komuter td..! ouch!

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

ThE sTorE vS JusCo..!

huhu..just came back from the store actually..the only the 'mall' at Sg buloh had..LOL..!went there just had my dinner there..wif blckpper burger at McD..OMG!! McD again..? lyk McD so much!! <3 hihii!! then just walking around there..nothing interesting than Jusco Metro Prima Kepong..well, last Saturday my friends and i went to Kepong..after drop by at Jusco to buy some presents we were browsed some restaurant that serve steamboat..unfortunately there's no one served halal steamboat..!! hihihi~ lyk to carve there..hahaha

p/s: nk g OU laa next week!!

Monday, October 11, 2010

Anda berpeluang untuk memenangi hadiah berupa Iphone 3G 16GB dari kami dengan menyertai “Top Referrer Contest” yang dilancarkan dari 1 Oktober 2010 sehingga 31 Oktober 2010.

Bagaimana untuk menyertai peraduan ini?

Mudah saja, anda hanya perlu letakkan banner dan link di bawah ini ke dalam laman web anda. Kami akan mengira pengunjung yang datang dari website anda ke laman web ini. Peserta yang dapat membawa pengunjung terbanyak akan menerima hadiah iphone 3G dari pihak kami.

Bila tarikh bermula dan tamat peraduan ini?

Peraduan ini bermula dari 1 Oktober 2010 hingga 31 Oktober 2010. Kami akan umumkan nama pemenang dalam blog ini. Pemenang akan dihubungi untuk proses penghantaran hadiah.


1. Point akan dikira berdasarkan jumlah pengunjung. Jadi self-click (klik pada link sendiri untuk menambah point) tidak akan berhasil.

2. Pihak kami berhak untuk menukar hadiah yang menyamai nilai asal sekiranya terdapat sebarang perubahan.

3. Pemenang tidak boleh menukar hadiah kepada wang ringgit.

Apa tunggu lagi? Letakkan banner tersebut sekarang. Lebih awal anda menyertai, lebih ramai pengunjung akan dapat anda kumpul.

kad kahwin
Kad Kahwin

Sunday, October 10, 2010


great! today's date is 10-10-10 ..should i write at 10:10am but then dat tyme am bz wif such fool thing(s)..hhahaha!!
supposed this date be meant to us rite..i'm sure..some of u guys a lots things to share bout this date..but for me is nothng..hahha! but then i am glad to hear from u ols..hihi! =)

p/s: ingtkah tarikh 09-09-09 atau 08-08-08 mahu pun 07-07-07 ketika itu anda buat apa..?

Friday, October 8, 2010

waHai ProPosAL..!

hello!! now i got time to write my blog again..i wan to share wif u guys bout my proposal..all bout my research's proposal..!! well for da first meeting is diz monday..but then i have to think properly da tittle of my research..! after 3 times rejected by my lecturer, Pn. Shima..finally n lastly i got da research's tittle is "tahap komplian pesakit terhadap penggunaan ubat beta-blocker di kalangan peakit hypertension"..!! i really so satisfied wif my tittle..but then i clogged till i got flue and fever..because of the research..! i have to focus to do da draft of my proposal..and my first meeting with my supervisor, Miss Chuan Lee Phing..she is a head of pharmaceutic deprtmnt..hope she can help me a lot(s)..! =)

p/s: dalam keadaan fever yg teruk..kene study utk exam mock dispensing diz Monday..!

Wednesday, September 29, 2010


TaRikH KerAmaT


hihih.. =)

p/s: thought at all..buddies..! ;p

Sunday, September 12, 2010

EPy Eid..!

today is 3rd Syawal..still got feeling of raya's mood.. huhu..but then am still thinking of my assingmnt..hurr! when diz such thing would be compete..! adoi..
still lazy wanna to do..coz of raya-lah kan..huhuh..
as usual for da first day am goin to my granny's house at KB..then in the evening goin to mom's villge..huhu..for second day still visiting my relatives at nearby..huhu..
but then i saw someone in the first Syawal..OMG~
juz forget it..i heard 'dia' da oversea studnt at
not bad as well as educated n looking..! huhu..
humm..on first raya jgk laa si dia tuh asyk bz memnjang..uwaa!!

p/s: still thinking of u even hari raya(hari bz)!

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

BaLik KampUng..! am goin back to my hometown : Kota Bharu, Kelantan..huhu...cnt wait diz..u noe oredi about 3 months i not goin back yet..huhu..the moment to mish ol my famliy members really clung in my heart as well..hihi~
i will take da campus bus direct to Kota bus on 8am kot..haha..not confirm, maybe around dat time laa..but then i cant wait to arrive this evening..coz my sis will take my goin to bazaar ramadhan there..i will buy a lot of food in Kelantan..OMG! lyk feel da heaven well! hihi..
now i got to to bath tub..then take my bus! see ya later guys!

p/s: my sis plzz do remind fetch me soon! TQ~ (",)

Friday, September 3, 2010

chOcO + Kad RayA..!

hehehe..OMG! i cant believe diz..she gift me all these things..hahha! thnxx very much syg..hahahaha! i just explored ur blog..then found dat u r goin to give these to smeone is so lucky for yours! is it me? hahaha..i really appreciate diz..thnxx again! raya t jgn lupa dtg umah yek! jumpa mak bapak saya..! hahahahaha~

p/s: fes kad raya dpt taon niey!

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

eXam 10%..!

yesterday i got exam..a formative exam..did by En Ariffin, a pharmacology IV's lecturer..huhu! the topic is about rheumatic and gout..huhu! even i didnt study at all but then praised to God coz am still can answered very well..hihi~
hope diz will carry 10% full mark to my final exam soon..! yah!

p/s: next week exam topic serbuk, tablet n capsule..

Sunday, August 29, 2010

sTep Up 3 (3D)..!

yesterday..i went to Mid Valley, KL and watched movie..the tittle is Step Up 3D..fuhh! i really do like this kind of movie..a dancing movie.. damn besh!!! here a review bout this movie..! =)

"The story begins in traditional video style, as several of the film's characters are recorded and asked a series of questions about why they dance. The film then cuts to Moose and Camille Gage who are both dancers and attend New York University. Moose is majoring in electrical engineering after promising his mother that he would not dance anymore. He soon stumbles upon a dance battle, meeting Luke and his House of Pirates dance crew and later teaming up with them to compete in the World Jam dance contest against their rivals, the House of Samurai dance crew.

Luke meets a girl named Natalie at his club and quickly takes notice of her dancing abilities, enlisting her to become part of his crew and hoping her talent can bring them to victory. However, he is unaware of Natalie's true motives.

Moose found his time to be increasingly tighter as he had to choose between studies and dance many times, including once when his test clashes with a dance competition. He decides to go for the test, but upon seeing the test paper and receiving an angry message from Luke, he decides to forgo the test and rushes to the competition in the nick of time.

Luke and Natalie become increasingly close as the movie progresses. They share many intimate moments, such as standing above an air vent and blowing "slurpee bubbles" and also Luke explaining his true intentions with his recordings - he wants to start a course using his own dance interviews. Yet Natalie is hiding the fact that her brother is Julian from the enemy House of Samurai and lies about everything but the love connection between her and Luke.

Natalie faces a hard decision torn between her love and her family. She decides to leave Luke. However, Julian uses her phone to send an invitation to Luke for her birthday party. Luke went in search for Natalie, and while they were having an intimate moment Julian takes the chance to appear. Natalie's identity is then revealed to Luke by Julian.

Moose and Camille are best friends but Moose doesn't seem to see that Camille is in love with him. The two fall out during the film because Moose lies to Camille about dancing and she feels like he can't talk to her anymore. Camille feels that Moose doesn't have time for her anymore and tells him she misses him and feels like he doesn't miss her at all. Moose tells Camille that he misses dancing but misses her more and that she is his best friend in the whole world.

The two make up on NYC streets by dancing to a remix of Gene Kelly and Ginger Rogers. Camille tells Moose that he can never give up dancing as he was born to do it. Moose then helps out Luke by giving him additional members for his crew including Camille and The MSA Crew from Step Up 2: The Streets.

Natalie helps Luke to win the World Jam at the end with the routine they had practiced in the past. She invites him to come with her to California, which he does at the end of the film, meeting her at the train station and kissing her. Following this, Moose kisses Camille, showing her he really does like her. Before leaving for California with Natalie, Luke gives Moose a pair of Limited Edition Gun Metal Nike Dunks which he saw at the beginning of the film with Camille on NYU Campus. The film ends with Moose and Camille saying 'Lets Party People' to the crew."

Saturday, August 28, 2010

sHoppiNg RayA..! =)

yesterday (27th Auguust 2010) my frenz and i went KL to shopping raya..hihi..
stephanie jessica, zaza, meckenzie, radzuan n i went to Times Square, Sungei Wang n!
so tired..damn tired..till my feet was chafed..uhh! gara2 pakai kasut Basyir..hihi..nyway thnx bagi pinjam..hahaha! but then almost rm200 shopping smlm..hahah! from top to toe..hiii~ =)
after that we all breaking fast at Pavillion..i juz ordered claypot..the price is rm7++ plus with orange juice rm2.80..then goin shopping aagin at Times Square..but then we all rushing to go back college bfore 10pm..hahah..rushing to catch train,monorail n taxi..hahaha!

p/s: today goin to Mid Valley, KL

Sunday, August 22, 2010

InjEctiOn Ohh inJectiOn !!

rajah 1 : i am trying to syringe out the Magnesium Sulphate amplule to the syringe 5ml

rajah 2 : shima and mariyah is trying to put da bubble out from syringe..

hihi! last week my classmate and i juz do some interesting thing..dats is a injection drugs..hihi..we just doin some activity at aseptic room..hihi! diz such as TPN, CDR and TDM..huhu! anyway i lyk doin anyones wanna inject by me? put up ur hand..hahaha!

p/s: trivia ~ y we need to put da bubbles out from syringe ?

Sunday, August 15, 2010


niey suppository yg firdaus buat..x jadi kan..heheh

niey spe nth bntuk x lawa..hahaha

niey najmi yg buat..perghh! dpt pujian niey

this one is mine..hihi! lawa x?

last frnz and i juz did a suppository..a rectum medication..hihihi~
u guys noe we juz do dat bfore the come dat..hihi!
but then i am so intersng doin this medicine..hihihi! u guys noe diz suppository is juz for rectum use only..indication as laxative, for treatmnt endoscopy, and others..hihi!
this a gelatin suppository..hihi~ watch out..!

Friday, August 6, 2010

nAsyiD ooO naSyid..!

huhu..this happened last week..
i just took part in nasyid competition with my friends..they are basyir,faris,njmi,mail,taufik,bad,nzri ,daos,naim n
even we not too many members but then we cn do our best so~
the most important is out team got 3rd place..dat so satisfied for us..!

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

MY ruMATe'S BfDAy..!

hihi..actually this happened last week..a day before our's nasyd competition..but then..i a liitle bit bz to write my blog..huhu..besides my actually b.o.d of my rumate is 19th july...huhu!
we oredi plnned for him..for fes stage is main simbah2.hih..we do some prepration lyk air tepung, air belacan n air abu rokok..hihi!
jgn marah!!! sj men suka2..anyway we oredi put some anti-infection there..;p
for the nesxt day is stge two is do some party..hih! lets get some cakes n junk food!!!!
anywy i oredi gve him some present..forgot to snap my present special for him..lalalala~~

p/s: tak sabar nk masuk tahun depan yg ke-21..

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

eVerYdAy iS bOrinG dAY..!

huhu..everyday is boring day..!
i sure u all agree with me right..huhu..for me..everyday come to the the same thing..huhu..ver very bored..even we dun hv any gap for our class..only gap just able to do eat only 30mins..huhu..and lunch for an hour..sux! but then sometimes when lectures do not come to the class i hv to stay in the class..wht we are goin to do is watching movies..hihi~
so enjoying coz dats my fav hoby..hihi~
u guys noe my lecture hall so cold ever lyk London~ hahahaah!
till i lyk need double sweater..hahahax!! sometimes in my class i just played around with Ding-Ding..she a funny girl i ever met..hahaha..sorry Ding-Ding..hahaha!
we were made a flight right today? i lyk it..hahahx!!
but then we need to complete four assignmtn(s) within these several weeks..ohh no~~

Saturday, July 31, 2010


weekend just arrived again!! i lyk it most..why? coz i am sure evryone knows da answer right? hihi~
but then this weekend i hv to stay at the hostel je..coz i dun hv much money to hang out..errmm.hihi! waaaaaaa~
so just stay my room..i only read the novel..opppss!
novel just borrowed from my friends..hihi! x da duit jgk nk beli novel..allalaal~
tp kan dari ak dok baca novel better for me read pharmacology kan? now i hv 4 assignmnt(s)...ohhh no! all these assgnmnts i hv to submit bfore the end of this month..nooo!
dh laa nk kene hafal ubt byk plax tuh this sem..its owkey! dats wat chllnge of our study filed of pharmacy! cahiyok2..!!

p/s: dalam kesibukan membuat aasgnmnt sempat lagi ak dan kwan2 berlatih nasyid..

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

CLiNicAL PosTing~

hurr..! starting from now i've to think, think and thinking where should place to be my second homwtown within a year...coz i will do a practical or attchmt at hospital about one year..huhuh..means two sem(s)..humm!
i am lost! am tension..where should i choose...! is it really hometown???? kota bharu? hospital raja perempuan zainab 2 ???? emm..dunno~~
coz even the staffs there so nice but then i really dun lyk my house as bored there..! in addition, there's no smethng intrstng there..but then i must stay nearly wif my dat when i am homesick or miss my parents i can back anytime..humm!
is it terengganu? wat about then? good idea?? or kuantan?
but then Kak Mila ever ask me just now..she ask to do clinical posting at Penang..dats a gud idea coz i hv my relatives there..huhu~
so jimat for me utk balik kmpung time raya or cuti sem nnt..hihi~
but then i hv to think carefully..huhu!

wats ur guys' opinions..?

p/s: mgu dpn ada "mock dispensing"..tkt nye~

Monday, July 26, 2010

LePaK JuSCo MEtRO PriMa KePOng!!

yesterday (Sunday, 25th July 2010) i went outing at the Jusco Kepong with my friends (Najmi, Syakila, Firdaus, Gan, Geraldine, Thank).
we were went there by taxi direct from college...
when just arrived there najmi, syakila, daos and i took our breakfast+lunch at the food court..i ordered a claypot nasi goreng + ayam..huh..not bad but then too salty..hurr!
after that we were went to watch the movie..tittle Mantra..this movie so disgusting and nonsense.. u noe they use mantra atau ilmu hitam to their life..but then i got moral values from there..with ilmu hitam our life not perfect and for sure God not accept us even the earth!
after finished watched dat movie we were do a job dat i love most dat is shopping..but then this time i cant shopping my wardrobe coz dun have much budget lorr!! i juz shopping my props as well as birthday gift for my lovely roomate, Faris! i just bought for him is chocolate + deodorant..hihi..! am sure and very hope he's not a typical sensitive person when i give him soon..y i bought him a deodorant coz he ever wore dat kind of deodorant dat is Nivea and the smelly is so fruity..! huhu~

then we back to coollege on 6.30pm..even tired i make a time vacancy for my room..decorate + tidy up after two days not to do so!

p/s: bought a speaker too! nice and cute one~

LePaK JuSCo MEtRO PriMa KePOng!!

yesterday (Sunday, 25th July 2010) i went outing at the Jusco Kepong with my friends (Najmi, Syakila, Firdaus, Gan, Geraldine, Thank).
we were went there by taxi direct from college...
when just arrived there najmi, syakila, daos and i took our breakfast+lunch at the food court..i ordered a claypot nasi goreng + ayam..huh..not bad but then too salty..hurr!
after that we were went to watch the movie..tittle Mantra..this movie so disgusting and nonsense.. u noe they use mantra atau ilmu hitam to their life..but then i got moral values from there..with ilmu hitam our life not perfect and for sure God not accept us even the earth!
after finished watched dat movie we were do a job dat i love most dat is shopping..but then this time i cant shopping my wardrobe coz dun have much budget lorr!! i juz shopping my props as well as birthday gift for my lovely roomate, Faris! i just bought for him is chocolate + deodorant..hihi..! am sure and very hope he's not a typical sensitive person when i give him soon..y i bought him a deodorant coz he ever wore dat kind of deodorant dat is Nivea and the smelly is so fruity..! huhu~

then we back to coollege on 6.30pm..even tired i make a time vacancy for my room..decorate + tidy up after two days not to do so!

p/s: bought a speaker too! nice and cute one~

Saturday, July 24, 2010

DanCe oOo DanCe~~

today early morning i hv to attend a workshop orgnaized by induk kebudayaan at my cmpus..then i am selected by lecturer as fasilitator on dance workshop!
wow great~
hihi..juz make it simple..theme is modern juz take it easy..
so we need to practice all one day then sharp 230pm we hv to i hv to take one team..then i wil be a choreographer for them..
i decided to teach them two types of modern dance dats is sway dat its lyk as tango dance then a moder india dance...hhihhi!
all these types of dance were helped by my friends as well..i am proud of my frinds and i..hehhehe!
when all the judges make their team got the 2nd places..hihi!
i am happy with them..
hope our team always support for local dancer!!

p/s : fokus untuk nasyid the end of this month..

Tuesday, July 13, 2010


x tau nk ckp pe!!!
moga teruskan support my blog!!
idop Malaysia..~~

p/s: nth pape!

Saturday, May 8, 2010

sErinG diGangGu.?! jekk nk post sumtink niey..
boring yg teramat..hummm~
today is da weeknd day..just stay at study and study..!
lau ak kt bilik selalu jek kene ggu oleh2 makhluk Tuhan yg kunun seksi tuuu..ahahhahhaah~

eg: miszta radzuan ( virus jenis bio-sfty level tahap 3 nye) huhuhuhu..dye selalu kaco ak dlm bilik time ak on9..pstu ngadu luahan perasaan dye..dh le dye nye tatse tuu x 'cando' lgsg..hahaha..pape pon moga ko bhagie...kwang3..;p

eg: auummm aka rhman..dye slalu kaco ak sbb kunun nk ngorat akk ak laa kan..gewdix gler mamat niey..dtg x kira masa lax dye dtg penuh dgn ilmu tauu...dax 4 flat kan..LOL~

eg: topex jiran yg hmpeh~ dtg kaco ak dan rumate ak..sbb dye nk pow kte org nye mknn dlm bilik ini..haiyyyoo~

eg: tetamu terbaru aidil..heheheheh~ dye dtg kaco ak study jekk kot..

eg: dulu tetmau ter'hits' adlh bad..skng no longer~

ini lah mereka yg selalu dtg bilik ak..buat bilik ak nih happening gler..! hahakkk~

p/s: second last weeknd for this semester...!

Friday, May 7, 2010

sELEseMa + eXam's MooD~

just started my final semester exam...start on 5th may till 14th may..
humm..unfortunately i got flu on da same time..why must once i hv an exam..i got flu oso..nope~
make me uncomfortable...cnt focus my exam as well..
today i am so happy answered the organic chemstry question..coz all SEQ (short essay question) 's i perfectly can aswered..alhmdulilah~

next week direct exam till friday..wuaargh!!

p/s: cnt wait this coming friday..nk tgk movie..dh 3 weeks pusa cinema..hahaha~

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

miSs dA a.H sO mucH!!!


today i am so excited laa..but only a little bit laa..

coz a.h messaging me last dye tuu nk cm bz laa..layan x nk layan je ak niey..huhuh..x pela..lps niey ak nk tgk setakat mane dye tuu cn last longer dgn haku..hahahah!!

hari ni exam farmaseutik III..really damn! da questions so hard nad hard..dpt buat sgt ssh laaa..soklan emulsi pon dh byk gler..soklan citair,pengeringan juga..semua tuu soklan pn.ayu...npe puan ayu letak soklan dye byk sgt...waaaa~

x pe la dugaan semua tuu kan..sox exam behavior sciences !!! nk skor laa subject nnih..adios mau study duluuu~

p/s: exam's mood 5th till 14th..! wish me luck~

Monday, May 3, 2010

ePy~ i'm so happy u know..coz i've met need to mention who is..hahahah~
then today also i skip my clss at 2pm..wawawawa~
dh x da kls wt pe staying there right?
but a little bit cuak dowh..coz i skip the clss to early..hahahah~
nevr mind..
now i hv to focus my final exam coming soon..wish me luck all!!!

rEnunG2 kan..!

Buat tatapan kita bersama~~~~renung2kanlah... CREDIT TO: i luv

Ayah aku meninggal 5 Ogos 2002 pada jam 3. 25pm. Perkara yang aku tuliskan di sini adalah untuk mereka yang masih lagi mempunyai orang tersayang, untuk terus menyayangi dan berjasa sebelum menyesal. Kematian abah amat meninggalkan kesan yang mendalam apatah lagi meninggalkan emak yang kesorangan. Anak-anak semua dah dewasa dan berkerja jauh. Hidup ini seolah tiada erti. Selama nie setiap suka duka pasti akan dimaklumkan pada emak dan abah. Kalau naik gaji atau dapat keputusan bagus pasti mereka mereka dimaklumkan sepaya mereka gembira. Kalau boleh mahu terus berada di Perak menemani mak yang terus menangis. Syukur, abah meninggal dalam pelukan mak yang mengucap dua kalimah syahadah di telinga kirinya dan aku ketika itu mengucap ditelinga kanannya. Ini adalah kali pertama aku melihat saat kematian. Masih terbayang abah memandang jauh kehadapan dan matanya ke atas sambil mengucap dan memejamkan mata. Sungguh cepat dan tenang, semoga roh abah ditempatkan bersama golongan yang beriman. Syukur solat jenazah abah lebih dari seratus orang. Syukur abah dikebumikan dengan selamat. Sejam sebelum kematian aku sempat berbual dengan abah. Abah kata kalau nak beli kereta tunggulah 2005. Bila time AFTA nanti kereta honda jatuh harga. Boleh lah bawak emak berjalan-jalan. Waktu tu abah dah sihat dan sudah ada selera makan. Selepas itu, abah suruh pergi buat kad pengenalan baru pada esok hari. Sebab abah dan emak baru sahaja buat kad pengenalan baru kelmarin. Abah kata hanya memakan masa sehari sahaja dan tidak perlu ambil gambar dekat kedai gambar kerana pejabat pendaftaran sudah mengunakan digital kamera. Abah kata jangan pakai baju putih kerana nanti gambar tidak jelas. Tetapi tidak sangka keesokan harinya aku pergi ke sana bukannya untuk membuat kad pengenalan baru, sebaliknya untuk membuat sijil kematian abah. Apabila Izrail datang mengambil nyawa kita tidak boleh menpercepat atau melengahkannya walaupun sesaat. Sampai sekarang masih terbayang keadaan abah di masa tu. Seakan tidak percaya abah hanya melihat ke atas dan menututup mata. Badannya tidak bergoyang walau seinci. Abah cuma hendak baring sambil mulut mengucap dua kalimah syahadah. Pertama kali aku pergi ke rumah mayat jenazah, pertama kali naik van jenazah, pertama kali aku membuat sijil kematian, pertama kali tidak tidur dua hari, pertama kali asyik menangis, pertama kali menimbus kubur, pertama kali menjirus air mawar, semuanya pertama kali. Dan pertama kali juga aku tidak akan berjumpa abah lagi. Aku memandikan abah dan memasangkan kain ihram sebagai kain kapan. Ketika ditutup muka abah, aku mencium dahi, pipi kanan, pipi kiri, dan bangun. Namun, tiba-tiba hati aku ingin terus mencium abah lagi. Aku membongkokkan kaki dan mencium dahi abah semula. Ciuman ini adalah ciuman terakhir. Semasa kecil aku selalu cium abah. Tetapi apabila sudah dewasa sudah lama aku tidak mencium pipinya. Aku dan abang mengangkat jenazah abah dan mengebumikannya. Hati ini sayu mengenangkan pemergian abah yang tercinta. Mak hanya memandang dengan air mata sayu, penglihatannya kosong. Setelah 36 tahun hidup bersama abah kini tinggal seorang. Selaku seorang anak, aku tahu bagaimana kasih seorang abah. Abah seorang pendiam, sabar dan alim. Jemaah masjid, bendahari masjid dan pelbagai amanah kebajikan dilakukannya. Aku selama ini tidak pernah meluahkan kasih kepada abah secara terus terang. Memang aku sayang abah cuma dengan abah aku hormat dan memendam kasihku. Lainnya pula dengan emak yang sentiasa berterus terang dan seringkali tidur di peha. Kelmarin, aku baca dairi abah. Tidak sangka abah pun tulis diari. Tiada perkara di dalam dairi itu melainkan perkara tentang anak-anaknya . Semuanya berkisar tentang anak-anaknya. Aku sendiri tak ingat bila aku membeli kereta tetapi abah catat 18 February: Rizal beli kereta satria hijau 1.6. Abah catat setiap kali anaknya telefon beserta waktunya. Sekali tu jam 1.00 pagi aku telefon dari KL dan terdapat juga dalam catatan abah. Semuanya abah catat berkenaan anaknya. Abah catat Rizal balik jam 2.00 tengahari bawa keropok. Abah catat Kak Se keguguran. Abah catat Shaifol, abangku yang sulung ke KL. Menangis kami semua apabila membaca dairi abah. Abah sayang anaknya tetapi tidak pernah tunjuk sebab abah lebih suka mendiamkan diri dan tidak bercakap pasal orang. Begitu juga dengan orang lain, abah hanya banyak bercakap pasal ilmu agama dan berkenaan anak-anaknya sahaja. Ada kawan kampung abah baru-baru ni cakap; "Abah kamu masa hidup salu cakap pasal anaknye. Sorang keje sana sorang keje sini. Dia bangga ada macam korang". Tapi jauh di sudut hati aku, aku masih terkilan sebab aku selalu fikir yang aku bukan anak yang baik. Abah memang suka tulis. Kalau fail atau dokumen pasal kereta, rumah, bil, kedai dan lain-lain memang semua tersusun. Aku terjumpa buku nota kuliah subuh abah yang terbaru. catatan terakhir yang abah tulis "hati orang beriman sentiasa ingat kubur". Abah gariskan perkataan ingat kubur dan kami bersyukur bahawa abah sememangnya telah bersiap sedia untuk meninggal. Dan menyerahkan kepada Allah untuk melepaskan seksaan di kubur dan api neraka. Abah memang suka budak kecil. Pantang berjumpa anak kecil pasti di dukungnya, bawa berjalan-jalan. Cucu-cucunya setiap kali balik pasti hendak tidur bersamanya. Kini semuanya sudah tiada. Ya Allah, aku tidak tahu bagaimana kehidupan ini untuk diteruskan tanpa abah. Aku baru bercadang hendak balik dan bertekad bonus tahun ini akan ku berikan abah dan emak masing-masing seribu ringgit. Tetapi Allah lebih menyayangginya. Abah meninggal 5hb tidak sempat merasai bonus pertama anaknya yang baru masuk pada 10hb Ogos 2002. Tidak sangka bonusku digunakan untuk majlis tahlil dan batu nisan untuk abah. Tok Imam ada memberitahu kepada kami; "Kubur ayah dikorek selepas itu ditanam tetapi tanahnya masih penuh dekat tepi. Terlebih, tandanya seorang yang pemurah. Sedangkan ada sesetengah kubur dikorek pastu ditimbus semula masih tidak cukup tanah." "Abah kamu wajahnya senyum walaupun sudah meninggal" "Abah kamu waktu dimandikan dah bersih. Tidak ada kotor, najis pun tidak ada" Perkara itulah menyedapkan hati kami. Aku solat Jumaat minggu sudah di Masjid. Aku memulangkan semula duit masjid dan buku akaun yang abah pegang selaku bendahari. Sambil mengira kutipan Jumaat hari itu tok imam dan bilal turut menangis. "Dulu abah kau yang tolong kira pastu tulis kat white board tu." Ini semua membuat aku rasa terpanggil untuk kembali ke kampung walau kerja apa sekali pun. Ya Allah, sesungguhnya kehilangan ini memberi hidayah kepada aku. Talkin buat abah masih segar. "Wahai Hj Badzri Bin Hajah Habsah...ketahuilah kamu bahawa mati itu benar, kiamat itu benar, Allah itu benar" Kita yang hidup akan pergi juga. Lelaki berat tanggungjawabnya. Suami menanggung dosa isteri dan anak-anak. InsyaAllah selaku anak-anak kami telah dibekalkan ilmu agama. Cuma, aku kini telah lupa untuk mengamalkannya sejak mula bekerja setelah terlupa dgn nikmat Allah. Emak juga seorang yang solehah. Aku yakin Allah Maha Pengampun dan Maha Bijaksana dalam menentukan Al-Mizan. Dahulu emak dan abah setiap waktu ke Masjid. Di rumah mereka sentiasa berdua. Tetapi sekarang ini, emak kata emak takut hendak ke masjid seorang diri. Takut hati tidak tenang teringatkan abah. Inilah perasaan aku sekarang. Buat kalian yang masih ada emak dan ayah jadikan ini iktibar. Cium pipi ayah sebelum ciuman terakhir dan curahkan kasih sayang tanpa selindung. Tunjukkan kasih sayang anda

Sunday, May 2, 2010


dh 2 hari kan ak x update blog niey..rupa2 nye ak masih dlm mood: struggle!!
ye! sbb result formatif ak kurang cemerlang...sgt menguciwa kan ak..! tidakkk~
namun, itulah kenyataan yg perlu ak accept it!!
pd spe ak nk persalah kan?? mungkin FB??? nope~
diri ku ini yg perlu dipersalah kan..ya! btol kawan2 ak..ak balik bilik je mesti keje ak on9 je..sehingga bil broadbnd ak naik!
gilak btol ak..
ape yg ak bersyukur sgt kerana ak dpt rasakan ak dpt hidayah sebelum ape2 menjadi bubur!!!
result formatif ak semua per 15%.. dua paper ak fail iaitu subjek amalan farmasi dan farmaseutik III..sgt pelik !! kenpa farmakologi ak tidak gagal!!!
now i have to struggle, struggle and struggle!!!!!!

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